Hey you,
Yes. You. You are great. You may not be perfect but none of us are. There is at least one thing in this world that you are good at, maybe even great at. So don't be so hard on yourself. Yes the world is a hard and scary place, but that is something we all face. I do not mean to say that you shouldn't feel tired and scared but rather, you should never feel alone.
"But everyone else seems to be able to handle the world. Why am I the only one who just can't figure it out?" Here is one piece of truth you should never forget, ready: no one knows what they are doing. And if they do they get pushed up into a different position in the world where they have to start over. Everyone is just doing the best they can. Just like you. You may feel like you are somehow inferior to the rest of the world but that just isn't true.
You, my friend, are amazing. You make the world better. Without you, the world would be a different place. You are part of a family, a culture, a country. YOU are part of this world. And whether you realize it or not, someone out there needs you in their life. Somebody's life is better because you are there. Maybe there is someone who thinks that you have it so together and they wonder how you do it. So don't get down on yourself. You know you can be great, I know you can be great. So, my friend, go be great.
You got this.
Sincerely,
B. Anne
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Monday, December 2, 2013
Pushing Back
You know that thing that doctor's use to get your tongue out of the way to check out your throat. You know, a tongue depressor? i always wondered why it was called that. I mean is it really depressing your tongue? Or is it about the force of pushing down?
See that's what depression is like. It is like you are being pushed down, and you can wriggle your tongue around to try to get above it, but it just keeps pushing. And you can try to push your tongue back up against it, but it just keeps pushing. And somehow, it always seems to be stronger than you. So day by day, you fight a little less. Because if nothing else, you get tired. Tired of fighting, tired of trying, tired of caring. Eventually you start to aaccept that it will always be there pushing and so you stop pushing back. You think to yourself, 'if it is stronger than me, shouldn't I just give in?' So you do and you hope that will make the pressure ease up.
And it does at first. You are overcome with a great relief...no not relief...apathy. A great apathy. You feel like it can't hurt you anymore because you are giving in. You just stop caring. But here is the big secret that really isn't a secret:
Every day you can keep pushing back makes you stronger. You work the muscles of willpower a little bit every time you push back, and if you can manage to keep trying and fighting even when it would be easier to give in, you get better. Eventually you can push it back enough to be normal. And sometimes, if you ask nicely, some one can come help you push back. Eventually you can push so hard that you win. And though depression can never really be beaten, every battle you fight makes you better at staving them off.
Like I said it isn't really a secret. It is just hard. And giving up will always seem easier, but in the long run it isn't. In the long run giving up will make it harder to fight back when you need to. So fight back. I will fight back and I will never have to do that alone.
See that's what depression is like. It is like you are being pushed down, and you can wriggle your tongue around to try to get above it, but it just keeps pushing. And you can try to push your tongue back up against it, but it just keeps pushing. And somehow, it always seems to be stronger than you. So day by day, you fight a little less. Because if nothing else, you get tired. Tired of fighting, tired of trying, tired of caring. Eventually you start to aaccept that it will always be there pushing and so you stop pushing back. You think to yourself, 'if it is stronger than me, shouldn't I just give in?' So you do and you hope that will make the pressure ease up.
And it does at first. You are overcome with a great relief...no not relief...apathy. A great apathy. You feel like it can't hurt you anymore because you are giving in. You just stop caring. But here is the big secret that really isn't a secret:
Every day you can keep pushing back makes you stronger. You work the muscles of willpower a little bit every time you push back, and if you can manage to keep trying and fighting even when it would be easier to give in, you get better. Eventually you can push it back enough to be normal. And sometimes, if you ask nicely, some one can come help you push back. Eventually you can push so hard that you win. And though depression can never really be beaten, every battle you fight makes you better at staving them off.
Like I said it isn't really a secret. It is just hard. And giving up will always seem easier, but in the long run it isn't. In the long run giving up will make it harder to fight back when you need to. So fight back. I will fight back and I will never have to do that alone.
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